"Because of you" - Kelly Clarkson


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"Because of you" - Kelly Clarkson
09.22.05 (11:31 am)   [edit]
I am finding that I am having those weird phases that I had in first year, where I feel nervous/anxious. My pulse quickens, breathing needs to be forced, and I can't sit still. Something in me just wants to run around, run away. What from? I don't know. Just random, out of no where, I get this. My limbs feel kinda weak, my stomach doesn't feel that great, and I actually feel like throwing up alittle bit. :S

I lost my bus pass and student card today. :( I really hope someone finds it and gives it to infoSource at UCC. Otherwise, I'm gonna need to pay another 100 for another bus pass, or I should just pay per use. :^) I need my student card to get into lab rooms though! grr... I guess I'm walking, or paying for the bus tomorrow. ugh.

OH. My group project in Intro to Software Engineering class seems nice, two are older students (one is a mother of two, the other seems like he could be 30-40), one didn't even show up to class today (just a GREAT way to start the project, eh?), and the other is a friend of m---'s. FAAAANTASTIC :roll: I don't mind him too much though. But the three of us all have Networks together, so I dunno if we're gonna be forced to talk to each other. I'll play it by ear. I was told not to talk to him at all, unless he says hi or something, not until I'm completely over him. I'm not quite sure why I'm not over it yet, I've already established that he's an ass, and a jerk, and a cheater, and I can't trust anything he said, or has ever said to me, and everything that happened was prolly not even real. All lies. All fake. So I'm not even sure what I am holding onto. I'm holding onto a time when I thought I was happy. Really truly happy. But I don't even think the stories/events behind that happiness were real. What am I waiting for exactly? I should have been able to throw all those emotions out the window by now. But I haven't.
 


posted by: CrazyBeautiful3 (reply)
post date: 09.22.05 (11:45 am)

don't close you self off comptley. and by the way the kelly clarkson song is a good song. i sora went through the same phase by the way, it's all part of growing up. you'll be ok. if you need someone to talk to you could aks me if you want. hope the nervouse/anxiouse feeling goes away soon.



posted by: csw (reply)
post date: 09.23.05 (3:40 am)

OH NO!!
i'm sorry about ur Student card &bus pass!
i hope someone turns them in!
have u checked w/ campus police?
sometimes ppl drop them off there... and w/ bus drivers too... so it might be at LTC headquarters... perhaps *-)
hopefully.
i hope/know things'll turn around for u soon manz...
GIVE YOURSELF TIME!
time heals all wounds man.
as does sleep.
so i say... give yourself time and sleep as much as possible. :)
<3
(btw i love to switch it up w/ the names... that's y i didn't use 'blop' on hana's blog.)
u doing work tonight? (Friday) a friend may be dropping by ur place...*-)



posted by: SmilezAlwayz (reply)
post date: 09.23.05 (3:28 pm)

Reply to: csw
Yup, I got my bus pass/student card back today at InfoSource at UCC. But I also have 4 extra bus tickets now...boo... does ur roomate ever take the bus ? (I know she has a car..but u never know with gas nowadays :^) )

hehe, yeah, i think the feelings are slowly wearing off finally. I talked to him today (okay, he talked to me and then i responded) cause we were both the only ones early to class (like, 20 ridiculously early minutes!). But yeah, the conversation was decent. :^)



posted by: moi (reply)
post date: 09.24.05 (5:36 pm)

Reply to: SmilezAlwayz
yay! goodjob on getting ur cards back! :D
nope... my roommie doesn't use the bus.
i'm glad the conversation went well!



posted by: Char (reply)
post date: 10.02.05 (7:49 am)

that's the problem...you gotta stop thinking TOO much about it! But take it one step at a time..

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