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03.15.06 (6:32 pm)   [edit]
I saw m--- today when I went to talk to the TA for one of the classes we have together. I walked into the room, saw him, hesitated, stayed at the door, and then stood in the hall until they were done. I put my music on and stared at the floor. and was like that when he came out. I heard him say something involving my name, so I'm sure he said something to me, but I didn't really hear him. So I didn't respond or bother to look up, cause, well, I'm not talking to him if I don't ever have to for the rest of my life. It didnt' bug me as much as I thought it would. I mean, it did, but it didn't consume my day, like it would've if that had happened 5 months ago. Wow. 5 months. plus the summer. Why does it still bug me so much? I'm in that state where I'm not quite sure it happened. I mean, I have these random thoughts that I think are memories. But were they really? Did I imagine everything? I feel pain. I feel hate. I feel empty. I mean, it had to have come from SOMEWHERE/ONE, right? *-) It's weird. The past seems like a story that I know enough to feel it, but it didn't really happen. I mean, something that dumb couldn't have happened, could it? It's just too dumb for it to ever happen. hmm. What idiot would ever let that happen and actually fall for it all? It's too idiotic to ever be done by anyone. So it didn't happen, right?
 


posted by: (reply)
post date: 03.20.06 (3:24 am)

work on releasing the past by forgiving yourself and forgiving others. the past cannot be changed, but the past is precisely what it is, the past. release what you know longer need so that you can now make room to allow new experiences and new people to enter your life.



posted by: Lilz (reply)
post date: 03.20.06 (6:38 am)

It did happen mandy =S but saying that it feels like memories, and not being sure that it happened @ all is a sign that you've moved forward. keep moving forward mannnddyyyy =D

it's a new season, new summer, new year.... all those make it possible for a new you. ^_^



posted by: Mandy (reply)
post date: 03.20.06 (9:41 pm)

who is this person who keeps commenting and talking about releasing?!

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